It was early June, and I was miserably pregnant - but still far from my due date! Since my first daughter came right at 37 weeks, I had this faint hope (although I knew so much better) that #2 would also come early. So, once that 37 week mark came and went, I started going insane and feeling ridiculously overdue. Like every pregnant woman, I started examining my toilet paper, panties, poo, and anything and everything watching for the "signs" that labor was imminent. Of course, I had them all... and they didn't mean a damned thing.
I really wasn't THAT miserable, except my pelvis felt as though it was going to crack in half (and made a noise that reminded me of being a kid, and pulling the legs of my Barbie's apart - and then having them 'pop' out of the little plastic sockets, with that white plastic stuff... remember that? Eww) and I couldn't sleep for crap. I was achey, and kind of sick of having to hold my uterus up off my bladder to pee, and puffy - but could have been a lot worse. Still, though, I decided it was time to start working on Operation Baby OUT.
I walked, walked, walked, made my poor dh do things he probably did not care to do with a cranky, swollen whale (sorry about that, dear...), ate jalepeno poppers by the handful, climbed my wobbly self up onto a bike... anything and everything! Finally dh reminded me that the night before #1 was born, we had pulled weeds in the little flower garden out in front of our house. I rolled my eyes several times but decided what the hell... so A and I went out there and yanked half-heartedly at some weeds. Definitely made a dent, but the flowerbed still looked horrible. Had some dinner (don't remember what...!), went to bed (and again made my poor dh make a, um, prostaglandin deposit...?!), and thought about my big to-do list that I had made to keep myself busy and not looking for those aforementioned 'signs'. (The list included a pedicure the next day, calling to take 'call time' the next day at work, picking up some quilts at the dry cleaners, etc, etc)
Around 3 o'clock I woke up... with wet panties. Ewww! But, just like the first time around, I knew that it was amniotic fluid and not just a leaky bladder. To be sure, though, I snuck to the bathroom and fished out the nitrazine swab I had "accidently" liberated from work, and swabbed my gooky underwear - and saw a bright blue response immediately. Of course my heart was racing, and I got all shaky and excited (I had been dreaming of this and playing it in my mind for months, mind you!), but decided to shower before doing anything else... a girl's gotta be properly shaved for these kind of things, you know! So, I took a shower, then got online to kill a little bit of time and logged onto contractionmaster.com to see where my contractions (or lack of) were at. I also turned on the TV, and apparently at 3:30 a.m. there isn't a whole lot on - the old "Roseann" rerun where she's pushing free samples at the grocery store was all I got. Finally, around 4 I woke up dh, got his butt in the shower, and then after informing Jana of the change and rewriting my to-do list (so much for my pedi) we gathered the bags and walked over to the hospital. (I had called to let them know we were coming while dh was showering)
Go there, registered, got up to room 233 - and had the nitrazine now come out negative. Still not having much for contractions, and wondering if we'd even be staying. I was 2 cm at this point and pretty posterior (from my own guesses, I had been thinking I was around 2 for a while already) . But, nurse Angie decided to just put the IV in "just in case" (I was GBS positive this time), and wait and see - this was around 5 a.m. Assumed that Dr. Q would be coming in around 7 during rounds, so dh napped on the couch and I read my book ("No Country For Old Men") to pass the time... eventually reading only between contractions. By 7, I was definitely feeling them, but doing all right - I think it was around then that I put down the book, though; with the bustle of the day shift coming on around 7:30, dh woke up and turned on the TV, and kept asking me what I wanted to watch (not getting that I couldn't care less at this point!). My nurse manager - i.e. boss - came in around this point as well, and I remember talking through a contraction or two while she was in there, and afterwards thinking, "Huh, so far so good - I can still talk through them!". After that, though, they kept getting stronger, and I had to focus pretty intently on my focal point (the upper left drawer pull on the entertainment bureau) and breathe through them; I was also battling an achey back which I blamed on the bed... I started piling pillows on the bedside table and trying to hunch over it during contractions. Once or twice dh and I 'slow danced' through them. Around 8, since there was still no sign of the doc, I decided to hop in the shower both for the relief from the back pain and contractions, and also just for something to do to stay awake. Things got pretty intense in there, and I remember a few times thinking that if I pushed a little it might help... (it didn't). Still no doctor, so I stayed in there and alternated the hot water from my belly, to my back (or as best I could), to right at my perineum. I worked at visualizing that little head stretching my cervix and moving down... until finally at about 8:45 Dr. Q poked her head in to see how I was doing, and told me I didn't have to get out to see her if I was doing ok. By this point, I was thinking that I might be ready for something for pain, if things were moving - maybe nubain?? And I just wanted to know if things were progressing; if I was still only 3-4 cm's dilated I think I would have died, or begged for a c/s. I still felt like I was doing great... just tired!
So, I popped into bed, and she offers to break my water if I want; she also says that she has the nurses mixing up my second dose of ampicillin so we could get it in "just in case". I tell her it just depended on where we were dilation-wise if I wanted my water broke, and that I was maybe getting to the point for pain meds... so she grabs the amnihook and does the check. And pronounces me 9 cm! Since I had this great fear that I was only still 3 cm, I was pretty pumped... especially since I still had this mindset that things still had to get A LOT worse before getting to pushing. She decided against breaking my water, and the flurry of activities started (warmer and table coming in, that last dose of antibiotics being run in over 10 mins, etc) ... once the antibiotics were done, around 9:10 a.m., she broke the rest of my water (strange feeling!) and we started pushing. Pushing was awful! Last time I loved it... this time it killed me. Part of it was due to baby --- which also explains some of the back pain, which apparently was back labor! --- being posterior and rotating during pushing. At one point Dr. Q offered me some lidocaine gel to help with the burning, and I replied "it's not going to help at this point!" and everyone laughed at me... and then with the next contraction and push, I was ready to beg for it (except the head was coming out, and I couldn't get the words out... a little late, I guess!). Again, the best feeling in the world was when the shoulders slipped out and my second daughter was born at 9:15 a.m.
Due to a short cord, it was clamped right away (although I don't think I had even told the doc that I wanted to hold off on clamping/cutting until after it stopped pulsating) and cut by dh, and then she was placed on my tummy. I fumbled with the snaps on the gown, trying to get her to breast, until nurse Terrie said "it's easier this way" and just pulled the gown up from the bottom. Smart girl! She latched on easily and went to town... but I was still in awe of how HUGE she was!
Long story short, it was a very fast, relatively 'easy' natural labor - no pain meds, no unnecessary interventions. We did almost immediate skin-to-skin following birth, and my perineum remained intact with just a tiny skidmark. Recovery was fine, although the cramping was much, much stronger than with my first daughter - it was really worse than the labor was. My back was sore for a few weeks afterwards, but all in all - not too bad!
Olena Marie was born on 6/11/08 at 9:15 a.m., weighing in at 8# 7 oz, 19", and a whopping 35.5 cm head of dark hair.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Random thoughts on future projects
So, I have all of these random thoughts circling in my head (usually at nice, inopportune times like when I'm trying to fall asleep). Things like, what am I going to do with my life? And... what should I have for lunch tomorrow? What kind of research can I do for a thesis if I go further in school? So, in order to at least remember some of these silly little ideas, I'm putting them on here. As usual sorry for the boring babbling... but gotta do it.
Anyway, this morning after talking dh into getting up with the girls and playing the "I have a headache" card, I laid there and for whatever random reason starting thinking of what I could do as a research project. So one rough idea is making up some kind of pamphlet survey, and distributing them to participants in childbirth classes, and asking each mother to participate willingly. Then, when any primiparous (ie first time) mother comes into the hospital who *hasn't* taken birth classes, asking them to participate as well. The point being to see how being educated and prepared effects perception of the labor/delivery process. Although, I'm not sure how accurate it would be to have the sample of 'non-educated' mothers from ones who are coming in for antepartum reasons... that might mean that they are having issues (for whatever reason) already with the pregnancy and might not be simple, low-risk, 'easy' pregnancies - or at least not as similar of a ratio if that makes sense. Maybe I could work with physicians to distribute them, or just randomly send them to when getting the pre-cert sheets at the hospital... hmm. All these bugs to work out. Anyway, there would be a form for the initial 'baseline', then another assessment that would be filled out in the first 24-48 hrs postpartum, and then a second assessment which I would mail to them 6-8 weeks postpartum. Questions asked would be things like how do you expect your labor to go (on the initial form) and then reporting how they perceived that their labors actually did progress. There would also be a section on the early postpartum worksheet for the nurse to indicate length of labor, list complications, whether it was induced or natural labor, apgar scores, etc (and this would be filled in after the mother returns it - while still an inpatient - so that the nurses' assessment of the labor doesn't influence the mother's).
I'd also be interested in seeing how induced labors stack up in perceived pain/satisifaction of birth experience (such as "If I were to choose again, I would/would not choose induction, etc), or the presence of a doula (although I think this has been done - maybe something from the nurse/physician point of view, or even the father's).
Ok, ramble on.... but this is what goes on in my head, in my life...
Anyway, this morning after talking dh into getting up with the girls and playing the "I have a headache" card, I laid there and for whatever random reason starting thinking of what I could do as a research project. So one rough idea is making up some kind of pamphlet survey, and distributing them to participants in childbirth classes, and asking each mother to participate willingly. Then, when any primiparous (ie first time) mother comes into the hospital who *hasn't* taken birth classes, asking them to participate as well. The point being to see how being educated and prepared effects perception of the labor/delivery process. Although, I'm not sure how accurate it would be to have the sample of 'non-educated' mothers from ones who are coming in for antepartum reasons... that might mean that they are having issues (for whatever reason) already with the pregnancy and might not be simple, low-risk, 'easy' pregnancies - or at least not as similar of a ratio if that makes sense. Maybe I could work with physicians to distribute them, or just randomly send them to when getting the pre-cert sheets at the hospital... hmm. All these bugs to work out. Anyway, there would be a form for the initial 'baseline', then another assessment that would be filled out in the first 24-48 hrs postpartum, and then a second assessment which I would mail to them 6-8 weeks postpartum. Questions asked would be things like how do you expect your labor to go (on the initial form) and then reporting how they perceived that their labors actually did progress. There would also be a section on the early postpartum worksheet for the nurse to indicate length of labor, list complications, whether it was induced or natural labor, apgar scores, etc (and this would be filled in after the mother returns it - while still an inpatient - so that the nurses' assessment of the labor doesn't influence the mother's).
I'd also be interested in seeing how induced labors stack up in perceived pain/satisifaction of birth experience (such as "If I were to choose again, I would/would not choose induction, etc), or the presence of a doula (although I think this has been done - maybe something from the nurse/physician point of view, or even the father's).
Ok, ramble on.... but this is what goes on in my head, in my life...
Monday, August 25, 2008
Sore achey boobs and other joys of motherhood
Being a mother rocks, but it definitely has it's sore points. For example, chapped nipples and engorged boobs! In an effort to keep my milk supply from dwindling, I'm trying to up my pumping and nursing sessions each day - but OUCH!! So, I'm going to put pumping on the list of "not quite so pleasantries" of motherhood... the good things far outnumber the bad, though.
Things I love? Popsicle-sticky fingers, that sweaty-pickle smell on my toddler or the slightly-sour milk smell in the folds of my newborn. "I love you mumma" and "I buy you a bike!" and "I need a fork" while pilfering a container of dessert off the counter. Beautiful hazel eyes and messy ringlets curls, and the velvety soft scalp of a two-month-old. The hard work that it must be to poop (at least from the faces they make!), and the ease of making friends. How my husband turned into so much more in my eyes, more than just a friend, but the father of my reasons for living. Snuggling in the mornings, cold feet shocking each other under the covers, and the unexpected joys of sleeping in here or there a with everyone waking up refreshed and happy. Tiny little toenails and fingernails painted pale pink for the first time ever, and gummy grins getting to be a common occurence. Little tushies and big dreams, and the feeling that I am everything to them, just like they are to me...
... and I love that this is my life.
Things I love? Popsicle-sticky fingers, that sweaty-pickle smell on my toddler or the slightly-sour milk smell in the folds of my newborn. "I love you mumma" and "I buy you a bike!" and "I need a fork" while pilfering a container of dessert off the counter. Beautiful hazel eyes and messy ringlets curls, and the velvety soft scalp of a two-month-old. The hard work that it must be to poop (at least from the faces they make!), and the ease of making friends. How my husband turned into so much more in my eyes, more than just a friend, but the father of my reasons for living. Snuggling in the mornings, cold feet shocking each other under the covers, and the unexpected joys of sleeping in here or there a with everyone waking up refreshed and happy. Tiny little toenails and fingernails painted pale pink for the first time ever, and gummy grins getting to be a common occurence. Little tushies and big dreams, and the feeling that I am everything to them, just like they are to me...
... and I love that this is my life.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Already forgetting...
... so I'm already forgetting this whole 'blogging' thing. Maybe it gets better with time? Or maybe this blog will live in eternity with two postings.
So we had L's baptism Thursday evening. I'm not sure how I feel about it... on one hand, I'm reassured that this traditional step has been done (as all the family is as well) but on the other hand, it seems as though that's all it is - a tradition. I don't know that a baby is able to make that commitment to God. And I'm not sure that I believe that God needs that commitment...? As much as the sermon that night preached going to church and having your world revolve around religion - I don't know. It seems like things like being a good, caring person and avoiding sins, and raising children in the Christian spirit, should be the 'biggies', instead of going to church every week and simply repeating words because "that's what you do". I don't know...
Darn Sylvia Browne books! I think I'm switching to that religion, it definitely fits my idea of the 'why' of life. We're all here, bettering our spirit. Although if that's so, I might be a young spirit...! Knock on wood, but this far I have not met any large challenges or tests.
I also sent out my grad school application (#1, anyway). Hopefully two of my three references will agree to fill out a recommendation form, since I kind of wrote their names in without asking them.... oops! I have two others in progress, but this is the one I really want. Actually, I lied I did not sent it out - it's still sitting on the table as our post office is a lazy bum. Long story... so maybe I'll walk over there soon....
Oh man is this ever boring. A friend has a blog and it's sooo much more fun! I swear she had been smoking something most of the time when writing her posts, or else she is just a deep, free spirit - but I loved it!
But, I guess this is my life....
So we had L's baptism Thursday evening. I'm not sure how I feel about it... on one hand, I'm reassured that this traditional step has been done (as all the family is as well) but on the other hand, it seems as though that's all it is - a tradition. I don't know that a baby is able to make that commitment to God. And I'm not sure that I believe that God needs that commitment...? As much as the sermon that night preached going to church and having your world revolve around religion - I don't know. It seems like things like being a good, caring person and avoiding sins, and raising children in the Christian spirit, should be the 'biggies', instead of going to church every week and simply repeating words because "that's what you do". I don't know...
Darn Sylvia Browne books! I think I'm switching to that religion, it definitely fits my idea of the 'why' of life. We're all here, bettering our spirit. Although if that's so, I might be a young spirit...! Knock on wood, but this far I have not met any large challenges or tests.
I also sent out my grad school application (#1, anyway). Hopefully two of my three references will agree to fill out a recommendation form, since I kind of wrote their names in without asking them.... oops! I have two others in progress, but this is the one I really want. Actually, I lied I did not sent it out - it's still sitting on the table as our post office is a lazy bum. Long story... so maybe I'll walk over there soon....
Oh man is this ever boring. A friend has a blog and it's sooo much more fun! I swear she had been smoking something most of the time when writing her posts, or else she is just a deep, free spirit - but I loved it!
But, I guess this is my life....
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Intro.. the beginning!
This is my blog... it's going to be far from exciting, at least most of the time. Probably not very funny, and most likely plain old boring. But, that's what these are for right?? (Remember that I am pushing thirty so you really have to cut me some slack on this whole "technology" thing)
Ok, so in a quickie introduction, I'm Mandi. I live in the midwest, my husband is a radiographer (which just means he takes x-rays and performs CT scans), and I have two beautiful daughters - a two year old, curly headed tomboy and a two and a half month old little "firemonster" (she has quite the temper, combined with a big set of lungs). They are both great, but so far seem to have completely different personalities! We've been married for three years (already!) and have been together since 2000; it seems like forever, though!
I currently have an associate's degree in nursing and work as a L&D nurse at a small rural hospital. As a small unit which averages around 300-400 deliveries yearly, all nurses do antepartum, intrapartum (labor), and postpartum care, as well as some post-discharge newborn assessments including weight checks and phototherapy. I also teach childbirth education classes. I *love* OB nursing, and can't imagine doing anything else... if I ever have to take care of any non-pregnant women, or see a penis more than an inch long (professionally, I mean!!), I don't know if I'll know what to do! I am planning to complete my bachelor's this December, and am keeping my fingers crossed that I will be accepted and able to start a Master's program as early as January.
I am on the fence - I am fascinated and thrilled by the idea of becoming a nurse-midwife, but in this area there are very, very few openings available. A more 'solid' choice would be to pursue a career as a nurse practitioner, but then I'd likely have to start working with other patient populations than just my moms and babies --- gasp! So this is one of the biggest dilemmas I'm facing right now....
OK, blah blah. This is my life...
Ok, so in a quickie introduction, I'm Mandi. I live in the midwest, my husband is a radiographer (which just means he takes x-rays and performs CT scans), and I have two beautiful daughters - a two year old, curly headed tomboy and a two and a half month old little "firemonster" (she has quite the temper, combined with a big set of lungs). They are both great, but so far seem to have completely different personalities! We've been married for three years (already!) and have been together since 2000; it seems like forever, though!
I currently have an associate's degree in nursing and work as a L&D nurse at a small rural hospital. As a small unit which averages around 300-400 deliveries yearly, all nurses do antepartum, intrapartum (labor), and postpartum care, as well as some post-discharge newborn assessments including weight checks and phototherapy. I also teach childbirth education classes. I *love* OB nursing, and can't imagine doing anything else... if I ever have to take care of any non-pregnant women, or see a penis more than an inch long (professionally, I mean!!), I don't know if I'll know what to do! I am planning to complete my bachelor's this December, and am keeping my fingers crossed that I will be accepted and able to start a Master's program as early as January.
I am on the fence - I am fascinated and thrilled by the idea of becoming a nurse-midwife, but in this area there are very, very few openings available. A more 'solid' choice would be to pursue a career as a nurse practitioner, but then I'd likely have to start working with other patient populations than just my moms and babies --- gasp! So this is one of the biggest dilemmas I'm facing right now....
OK, blah blah. This is my life...
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